Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
