I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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