Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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