Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
But theres a keg here and me gusta
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
