i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Randomize
