just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
