Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
