Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
