i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
