Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
no you cant smoke seaweed
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
