so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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