i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
