I need help removing her.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
