Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Randomize
