I should be sponsored by Trojan
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Text me some of your sweat
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