In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
