Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Did you just see the Batmobile???
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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