By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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