TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
