More tranny stories later!
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Randomize
