Christians are straight up FREAKS
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
