dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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