hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
It's just like the Real World with babies
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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