Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
