We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I stole a fireplace last night.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
