If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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