the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
