I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
