i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
