so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
