$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
