Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
