i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
thus making me awesome and them whores
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
