Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Randomize
