i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
