your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
