Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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