no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
