i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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