Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
as a side note pls kill me
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
