just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
