You're so nebulous sometimes
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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