If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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