Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
