he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
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