They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
