How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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