how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
