i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
