I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
