once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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